Saturday, April 20, 2013

On The Day You Were Born


In the days and weeks after my older son, Henry, was born I loved reading On The Day You Were Born by Debra Frasier. The last page was my favorite.

'Welcome to the spinning world,' the people sang,
as they washed your new, tiny hands....
And as they held you close they whispered into your open, curving ear,
“We are so glad you've come!'"

I read that book as a practice to convince myself that the words of the book are true. As I held Henry in his nursery, I would cry because I was so tired, I was so depressed, and I was so overwhelmed as a new mom. But as I looked into his sweet face, the words of that last page trained my mind and changed my heart to believe really how glad I was that he’d come. As the nights became more restful, the depression was treated and I felt more comfortable as a mother, I realized that those words were true all along. From the moment I found out I was pregnant to the moment I held him in my arms, and even now as I watch him make endless train tracks out of every inch of the house, I was and am so glad he came. This sentiment is God’s feeling towards his children.

Psalm 127:3-5  Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

I am so blessed to have my two boys. Each day I am so thankful for them and so thankful that they have come. That heart is God’s heart for each of his children, no matter how or when they come. He knows them. He forms them. He loves them and has a purpose for each one.

Psalm 139:13-16  For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.

Zaire was born three days ago to a young mama named Janaya. She has been staying with us on and off for the duration of her pregnancy. Most of society would say she is unfit to have a baby – no husband, no job, no education past high school. How could she possible raise a baby to have a better life that she did? Even some of Janaya’s closest friends and family suggested that she terminate her pregnancy and go on with her life. “Attend nursing school, do what you want to do, wait until later to have a baby.” She thought about it. It seemed appealing to not have morning sickness, to not put her life on hold for a baby, and to not disappoint her family. But, God had other plans. She knew in her heart, this baby was already hers. The words from Psalm 139 rained true to her, changed her mind, and shaped her heart. After a hard pregnancy and a long labor, Janaya met her son. The OBGYN place him on her chest and she stared in amazement at her son. She was a bit shocked, very tired, but in love. “I just want to hold him,” she said.



From my work as a doula, I see babies born a lot. They are born to married couples who have been trying for years to conceive, to couples whose baby entered their life as a surprise, and teen moms who are learning to parent earlier than most. But no matter when they arrive or how they arrive, the feeling is the same. “We’re so glad you’ve come!”

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Time to Celebrate!


The moment the clocked struck 12:15am on February 15th, my parents would dash into my room to wish me a happy birthday. At 8, I had a sleepover where my cousin and her boyfriend taught us all how to country line dance. At, 17 my mom made enough pound cake to serve the entire basketball stadium as everyone sang Happy Birthday to me at the end of our game. At 28, my husband surprised me with a dinner party with some of my favorite people. I love birthdays and really a celebration of any kind – a Christmas party, a Easter gathering, or just a Mexican themed dinner. But, really, birthdays are my favorite. They are one day completely dedicated to celebrating God’s purpose in a person’s life. God loved you so much that He created you, welcomed you into this world, and blessed others to know you. It is a wonderful day where I always want my friends and family to feel loved, cared for and do exactly what they want.

That feeling is what I wanted for Shante, an amazing newly 18 year old who is graduating from Church Hill Academy on June 1st. She has been a part of my L.O.V.E Bible study for 6 years and recently has become a part of our family. Joining us for dinner each night, babysitting our boys, spending the weekends with us have become commonplace. She is a joy to have around. Quiet but thoughtful and always willing to serve. As her 18th birthday approached, I asked her what she wanted to do for her birthday.

“You know, I’ve never had a birthday party before,” Shante said.

“Well, a birthday party it is.”

With guacamole being Shante’s favorite food of all time, a nacho bar was the logical party theme. But really, this night isn’t about guacamole or a really amazing ice cream cake. It is about Shante. As I finished placing each punch glass on the counter, my eyes teared up. My heart started to break. I thought back to every party, shower, wedding, that my dear, beautiful mother put on for her friends, friends’ children, and of course her own family. She tirelessly worked to celebrate others. Each perfectly arranged flower, each delicious dish, each coordinating napkin and plate; they all showed her love for others. Her actions taught me that others are to be celebrated. God’s children are beautiful, meaningful and meant to be celebrated at any age, at any stage. How thankful I am for my mother and her example.

And now I am weep over God’s heart for his people and how much he loves us, I am overwhelmed with sadness knowing Shante has never been celebrated before. No party. No balloons. No celebration of the beautiful, loyal, kind woman that she is. Not until tonight. The taco meat is made, ice cream cake decorated, and paper mache cactus painted. It's time to sing Happy Birthday and remember the purpose, the excitement, and the joy of Shante. From the moment you entered this world, until now, Shante, “I’m so glad you’ve come!”